The University of Richmond Collegian 10/20/94

Staff Editorial

by Jeffrey Carl, Opinion Editor

What We Think

an Opinion from the Collegian Staff

“Men’s Studies”

It is springtime for the inner feelings and sensitive emotional needs of campus males. At last we can feel the chains of repressive conditioning and enforced gender identities (“stale roles and tight buns”) pulling at our true selves. It is a glorious new dawn on this campus for the men to shed their swaggering, testosterone-besotted image and join the long-awaited programs now arriving to further men’s studies at the University of Richmond.

Yeah, right.

Look, it’s a nice idea and stuff, but let’s get real. Nobody’s gonna take that class (Psychology 249: Psychology of Men), and if they do, they’re wusses. Guys like being beer-swilling insensitive monsters. It’s fun. And besides, intensive studies have discovered that all the biggest jerks get all the girls anyway. We ask girls and they can’t even explain it.

This is not to say that we encourage men to be serial nun-abusers or dip-spitting NASCAR Richmond rednecks, but – truth be told – no self-respecting guy really thinks that they need to take a class to study how they’re being downtrodden and repressed and stuff.

Guys don’t get downtrodden and repressed and stuff. We suck it up and deal with it. All that wussy “get in touch with yourself” stuff may be psychologically beneficial, but it’s totally wasted on guys. Besides, any class period that dealt with some men’s liberation topic like “getting in touch with your penis” would just be met with a frantic chorus of hysterical, Beavis-like laughter.

In all earnestness, men’s studies programs and classes here are poorly attended because nobody likes them. Women’s studies is pretty much a silly idea to begin with, and they’re supposed to like sensitive and gushy stuff like that. How are guys supposed to study and maintain our emotional well-being? We don’t even shower regularly.

Men’s studies is, at best, one of those things you think would be nice to have, just to be fair and equanimitous, et cetera, but when push comes to shove, the guys are going to be skipping class to watch “Sex Sluts in the Slammer,” or at best they’ll be trying to figure out how to shave their backs without their roommates noticing.

Our intention is not to quash the whole idea of men having an outlet for learning more about themselves and their role in society. But here and now, it probably just ain’t gonna fly. Sorry. Suck it up.